Can anyone give me any advice about wanting to breastfeed and wanting to have another child?

I have a 16 month old son that I wanted to breastfeed so badly when he was born I was pushed out of it at the hospital due to him being so small and having to do sugar test I tried to relactate at 3 months old and the medicine they put me on let me get into a spiraling depression to this day I still want to breastfeed and feel depressed and angry that I Could not and can't Now due to this I'm getting to where I want to have another child To the point that that's all I think about is having another child just so I can breastfeed my so doesn't want one at all I just feel so upset and like. terrible mother To this day I can still get milk out of both breasts I think it's because I think of breastfeeding so much to the point that when a child cries my boobs will even tingle As if they are telling me to feed them lol can anyone give me any advice and help me

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